Some Lady Gaga filler.

I must thank the readers for mixing in their interesting commentary and world-views on my introductory post. But by now, you must have noticed the absence of substantial posts, or any posting on my behalf, on this blog. So, I'm bringing Lady Gaga to the rescue because my tiny oeuvre* is like a house on fire.

Here's a small background on how I feel about Lady Gaga. She first came out when I was but a young toddler at 14 years of age. I was first forced to listen to her in a Geography class while we were supposed to be doing bookwork, a cruel and unusual punishment, even though the teacher was nice and involved and everything a teacher should be and who am I to question her pedagogical judgment? I quickly denigrated her as "Lady Caca", and apparently, some crazy Hispanic neocon group still does. God, I was immature. Then, when Bad Romance came out, I adopted a weekly regiment of furtive viewings, out of fear than any open adoption might cause my parents to put two and two together. (He doesn't keep a girlfriend. He doesn't play sports. He enjoys Lady Gaga. Oh no!)

On top of that, I had controversy raging inside of myself because I felt that listening to pop music like Lady Gaga would be in violation of my [now abandoned and crushed] cultural principles. Principles that enjoined only reading high literature, listening to classical music, and speaking the Queen's English. Principles that banned enjoyment of pop culture or anything with the with even the lightest scent of anti-intellectualism.

Now I'm kind of a little monster. I went back and listened to all her music and made a ranking of the songs that I like. I'm interested in hearing your own. Or even why you don't like her, cause I'm sure most people don't. Do you consider her to be an attention-whore? The situation I would be most curious about is that of someone who has never heard of her! In which case any attention-whoring would be rendered moot point and we can all pack up and go home.

1. Judas. Something about safer aural sex. Kind of Very cool and catchy, although I would perfectly understand why it might be disliked, it surpassed my expectation that the song was going to rehash Monster. I even predicted that the chorus was going to be "That boy is a Jew-das**," so its tremendous creativity was a pleasant surprise (although I would have taken no less with that amount of hype). According to the mouth organs of the Catholic Church, the song skewers Jesus, Joseph, and the two Marys in a shish kebab and cooks them over Lady Gaga's hot mess. But that only really happens if you accept through non-logic that Jesus and gang are divine and worthy of extra human respect and that's where the whole philosophy of religion and their demands for acquiescence fall apart at the seams.
2. Retro, Dance, Freak is definitely my favorite very good now that I've listened to Judas an unspeakable number of times. The most unorthodox of her songs, and very glamorous and reminiscent of a disco scene. Her voice is completely different, it just has to be a different person singing it.
3. Teeth. The thigh-slapping beat, unusual sentence intonation, and semi-girly chorus makes this an [ambiguously] clear choice.
4. Monster. She's never seen one like that before. Neither have I.
5. Born This Way. I find it interesting because with this song, Lady Gaga is regressing [not the right word here] into ordinary musical and artistic territory as compared to her previous top hits, all overly involucred with electronic modifications and not enough of her real voice. But's it's not too much regressive-progress. Throughout the video, I was also unsure of what the items that she pulled out of her most sacred and feminine sanctuary was, and I've noticed that on now two occasions (Alejandro and this) she's made a masturbatory gesture of questionable metaphorism. Perhaps we should expect to get j***ed on in the Judas video? Preferably by Mary Magdalene, because that would be the only thing that could truly shock me.
6. Speechless. At first I thought she was saying "all my rectal friends". Normally I would have been more questioning, but this is Lady Gaga who hides things in her treasure trove we're talking about.
7. Telephone. The music video is both too cool and completely nonsensical. Are all female prison inmates that willing? Why do they murder the diners? What is the significance of the American flag, or the leopard print? None of it makes any sense except to include a multitude of colors and flavors of moral depravity.
8. Bad Romance. At first, this was my favorite song but my personal LG retrospective has slipped the carpet out from under it. Not even her best music video, which is definitely Telephone. Most certainly it includes the highest number of Lady Gaga's personalities in one video: the lady in black
9. Just Dance.
10. Paparazzi.
11. Dance in the Dark. Not sure what it's about, so I guess that makes it just like every other one of her songs.
12. Poker Face. Made redundant after the release of Bad Romance.

If I didn't say anything about some of the songs, it's because it'd be the same comment from the other one or I've run out of words to spill forth. I was also hoping that Lady Gaga's new album cover (which I actually like) would be a little more classier, particularly after the picture promoting it "GAGA 5+23+11" was so pretty and artful. But if anything, it shows her evolution into a much darker and interesting artistry very distant from the smooth visual and pop gradations of yesteryear which were equally interesting and shocking, like bird hatching from many diametrically opposed positions. I can't believe I've cheapened this blog so quickly, and so much.

Pointy cheeked image burglared from some guy.

*overused ever since its validity was rejected by a 9th grade English teacher and was ordered to be replaced by "body of work." However, I won't say it out loud until I've broken the word's virginity in a safe, familial place.

*Whoops! A Freudian slip. I've been making way too many comments about Israel. And Jews. Also a website where I just read on article corroborating Alon Levy's comments about threatening levels of neoconservatism in the Levant. Might I also add that: who do these Latino groups think they are? Are they convinced that they are the only ethnicity that practices Catholicism and who could potentially get offended?